Still, Small Voice

The offer came.  It wasn’t what I had hoped and prayed for, but it was evident that another “no” was going to devastate my husband.  So we said “yes” with me kicking and screaming and picturing every single worst-case scenario.  (There are many options to choose from.) 

                I am shaken already.  Since my prayers for the offer weren’t answered, do I dare pray for a good selling price for our current house?  For a new house that is clearly tailor-made for us?  For a way to earn a living part-time while staying at home with my kids?  I have been up all night for the last two nights, asking myself repeatedly, “Are we crazy? Are we doing something so incredibly stupid?  Moving all this way for just one income?”  I keep begging God for confirmation that we are doing the right thing. 

                The morning after James accepted the offer, I woke up with Jeremiah 29:11 running through my mind.  “’For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord.  ‘Plans to prosper you and not to harm you.  Plans to give you a hope and a future.’”  And then my Psalm for the day, Psalm 76, told me that the Lord resides in Salem.  Or Winston-Salem?  Am I reading too much into this?  Today, Psalm 77 describes a man up all night agonizing over circumstances, only to begin remembering the faithfulness of God in the past.  God certainly has been faithful to us, even in circumstances that seemed completely crazy.  “You are the God who performs miracles; you display your power among the peoples.” Psalm 77:14. 

                Perhaps this is God’s still small voice confirming this decision, as hard as it is.  I hope.